One Train Ride
May 27, 2021 12:10 pm Leave your thoughts
Holy hell, you’re almost wheezing after running 50 metres?
50.
Really? You used to jog those kilometres to the train with just slight discomfort and literally no sweat.
You wanted not to think about training because you’ll feel guilty and have FOMO for hours. You’ll think about that little guy who pissed you off and you always look forward to choking Then you’ll think about your declining skill level and the friendships, and wasted time watching Netflix at home on a “recovery break” that’s lasted the better part of 2 years. But how it’s hard to go back because it feels good to not experience any more adversity than you have to. But-but-but, you’ve never lived like that so while it’s comfortable, it’s also uncomfortable and you haven’t quite worked out which is the stronger feeling, thus still in limbo. Omg. Stop thinking about that.
Where’s that married couple that get on and talk to each other like they’re still in love? They really get into each other’s conversation and laugh all the way to their respective stations.
He was a fan. You’re gregarious. He couldn’t keep up. He’d lived an uneventful life before he met you. He was…enamoured with how “animated” you (apparently) were and how “alive” you were. He liked your voice and the way you dressed. He made plans with you, and he told you were everything. But you weren’t. That was why you were easy to throw away.
Nooooo don’t go there right now, because your imagination will kick in and you’ll check for an instant message that isn’t there and feel like crap all day.
Your eyeliner is uneven on one eye, btw. Remember? You were supposed to fix it when you boarded this thing.
You’ve had that book for months, in your bag, to and from your slave gig, beside your bed, on the couch, at your mum’s house, in the car. What happened to the days when you’d smash out a book and move onto the next in a matter of days?
God, you’re tired. You got about 4 hours sleep. Maybe you can nap when you get home, but…then that means your sleep will be out of whack. You might find it hard to wake up at 5:00 am tomorrow. And that is an important day you can’t mess up.
Fuck, your face is puffy AF today,
You also forgot the protein shake this morning.
Why is your mother awake this early? She’s never awake this early unless there’s a problem. Okay, her text is just hating on a piercing you’ve had for over a decade.
Remember a few months ago when you leaned over your dad to help his boomer ass with the computer and he asked you how long you’d had that piercing? (Who are those people?!)
Wonder if you’ll have time to check that lotto ticket in the machine when you get there. If you win a few mil, maybe you can buy a black house on a hill and just rot up there and everyone will leave you alone..mmmmm…
What if this skirt gets caught in the escalator at the station? Did you think of that? It’s long. You saw the material bunch up on the step behind as you were going down the last time you wore it. Omg, remember that vid CC showed you, where an escalator breaks and people get sucked down and die? Those things are more dangerous than people realise. Ugh you have to take several today.
It’s a pretty skirt. You wish there was a way of showing it off as well as the 16 hole docs underneath. This outfit is good.
Whoa. Your eyes were closed, but you know that was a train passing on the parallel track. No wonder a lot of people die when trains crash, you even felt the momentum from inside another vehicle on a totally different track! Do you think you’d die if they crashed into each other, based on where you’re sitting? Or like one of the Aliens movies where she bends her arm over a rail to keep herself anchored and her arm breaks! Remember that? Maybe your train gets pushed off the track and crunches together somewhere below. Maybe you can write about a lone survivor of a gnarly wreck. Yes, it’s been done before but you haven’t done it. And you can, so maybe you should.
Your face really does look like a puffy shit today.
When [redacted] told you he was now married. You don’t want him but…you didn’t think he’d actually marry someone else…you two always seem to find your way back to each other. You have since 21. Wow. Time flew. Wow, you haven’t grown up. You hope he’s going to have kids and that his mum is okay…
Hell yeah, those earrings are awesome. Good choice this morning. They match the red leopard print.
Should you play on your phone or read that book, I mean…why did you bring it with you AGAIN if you’re not going to read?
No one is wearing a face diaper/mask. That’s good because you didn’t bring one. Yours is dirty and covered in sweat and makeup, sitting at home by the laundry sink to be washed. Besides, fuck the hysterical police state.
That kid has no hairs on his legs.
Maybe you should check you were correct about the route you’re going to take tomorrow. It’s a long drive.
Wait, what? You didn’t put your headphones in the bag? Fuck! Don’t tell me you left them on the couch and- Motherfucker! Oh, there they are. Carry on.
Your favourite streamer posted a new video. Damn, it kind of sucked..at least it ate up 7mins of the journey.
You’re wondering what he’s doing. He’s probably playing Destiny 2 in his room. You still have his weather app on your phone, you know it’s raining where he is and that he’ll like it. His eyes were so pretty, he was a great person. You wonder if fate will twist again, and you can fly to see him. You wonder if he thinks about you.
Nooooo, don’t go there.
Your black nailpolish is very chipped. But it’s so bad it looks like a pattern and purposefully done. Yay!
Is the gay dude who sits next to you going to be there? He should have his own makeup tutorial channel by now. He’s always fixing his makeup and taking selfies. You kind of want to be alone, because he blocks the window trying to get good lighting on his mirror.
Why are you still hot in this cardigan? You only ran a little, and that was at least 15 mins ago now.
If you take it off, yo ass gon freeze when you get out of this tin can.
Hopefully the crazy man next door isn’t waiting outside when you get home.
You wonder what GG is doing. It was nice of him to text you good morning every day since he’s been gone. Even if it’s just crude selfies or a “Ello.” You know you replied to him while you were hurrying up the hill this morning but you have no idea what you said. You should probably check that. You were barely awake, who knows what you texted…
But you have sooo much screen time. Maybe you should close your eyes for another second or two.
Red Cowboys. Red Cowboys.Red Cowboys.Red Cowboys.Red Cowboys.Red Cowboys.Red Cowboys.Red Cowboys.Red Cowboys.Red Cowboys.Red Cowboys.Red Cowboys.Red Cowboys.Red Cowboys.Red Cowboys.Red Cowboys.Red Cowboys.Red Cowboys.Red Cowboys.Red Cowboys.Red Cowboys.Red Cowboys.Red Cowboys.Red Cowboys.Red Cowboys.Red Cowboys.
The fuck that lady staring at anyway?
Damn, VJ hasn’t replied to your meme yet. It was awesome!
You should load up that scary story vid you didn’t finish listening to last night. But you despise that woman’s voice. Are you up for that this early? It’s hard to concentrate on fear and death when the narration is by a valley girl who speaks with upwards intonation tones as if everything is a question. She also can’t pronounce the letter T. “The note was wri–en in blood,” and “He lived near the moun-ain”
Calm down.
Okay, get out that side, it will be nearer to the stairs. Try to walk calmly, these people trudge. Try not to accidentally push in front of anyone.
You hope to get the fast lane on the stairs and no one just stops walking, like they do on the left side…The amount of random asses you’ve almost touched…
Maybe you’ll get there so early you can work on a blog post…
TLDR:
*I think a lot.
*HALP.
*Red Cowboys is coming.
*I’m okay.
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Tags: A normal day, bored, Canadian cock, cc, corona, corona boogeyman, gay dude, GG, I miss you, imagination, intrusive thoughts, lost love, masks, nana nap, New guy, ocd, one train ride, pine, police state, rona, rona boogeyman, salty, the coof, thinking, train crash, youtube