Troubled Starr
October 1, 2020 12:38 am Leave your thoughts
Agent Trent Starr’s mental health has always been something I worked hard on.
When we meet him (in KOS,) he is skilled, retaining a sense of humour and a hesitance to talk about his time in the military. His transition from geeky, self-deprecating MDS agent to a soldier wasn’t too far for him to travel because the MDS is a strict training ground for “urban warfare.” Trent Starr had already been responsible for several hits/assassinations his superiors assigned by the time he was poached for military service on The Outside.
Trent Starr is a character that is fictional and has some superhero-like preternatural qualities cos, hey, fiction. But he is also rooted in reality and those aspects are ones that are the most relatable. He is somehow able to possess a disposition less jaded than probably expected for a talented, good looking seasoned contract killer (in comparison, Cleo Darkrose is brash, cynical and tired of everyone’s shit, uninterested in changing the disposition.) Starr’s interaction with civilians, other civilian-drafted soldiers on deployment etc seems to have made it so he can snipe someone’s head off clinically but when faced with someone up close in a regular setting, he usually shows them a respect and appreciates human life.
This clash of two extremes, turning them off and on faster and faster as well as the shock of being deployed in warzones for years plays into the splitting of his ideals and how he has to hastily scrape them up and smoosh them together enough to keep moving. RED COWBOYS (the next book) does feature Starr’s inner workings a lot more, and is a book that I’d say is mostly about the way he copes with the aftermath of trauma and his new assignments in addition to finding out more regarding the fate of Cleo Darkrose.
PTSD is not fun. Not everyone suffers the same way and not all PTSD is about soldiers who saw combat, though this is usually the theme associated with the disorder because it seems to be the fastest to translate to people who haven’t experienced it; a person experienced something you never will, saw things you never will and it affected them in an extreme way that they barely understand sometimes.
There are studies suggesting changes in the brain when suffering this disorder are similar in battered wives/victims of abuse, car crash survivors, and victims of crime. There are many elements to it, from enduring life-threatening situations, adrenalin dumps, to not being able to reconcile what you morally believed prior to what you were ordered to do. People struggle with all the components differently. I’ve spoken to victims of crime, domestic violence and veterans as well as read copious amounts of biographies by people living through traumatic events to gain perspectives. I also have my own PTSD/other to draw on. I found there are a lot of differences and variables between cases…but there are a LOT of similarities.
So back to Agent Starr: I wanted someone clearly damaged(upbringing MDS agents experience is cause enough) but trying to maintain a life and make up for things he believes he did wrong. This aspect is a very honourable human quality that I admire, and even if it’s not healthy to push yourself so hard or if they fail, it shows the person’s character eg that they wanted to make things as right as they could. I wanted the little boy still holding onto romanticised ideas of a future, while blasting people in the head. We’re all dragging baggage. Trent Starr is rarely afforded time to work through his because MDS expects more from their agents, and the weight adds to the injustices and decisions he is forced to make through his character arc.
He manages to keep parts of his personality intact though he is fighting battles in his head as well as on assignment. The show must go on and the world doesn’t stop long enough for you to catch up so you are left behind or you exhaust yourself trying to remain “normal.” For more on that, click here. Sometimes you even accomplish what you set out to while dragging the baggage, and you can get things done, but it doesn’t mean everything is ok.
Last week I took a break from working on my house and was watching something on youtube when a trailer for a new indie film came up. Pray They Stand Down caught my eye. The film’s Facebook says it is
“A story that follows a former marine, now civilian through spouts of PTSD, and Anxiety. His biggest challenge is when he returns home to Missouri. Follow Chad Sikeston on this action-packed journey, to the healing process, and use of amazing service dogs.“
I’m SOOOOOO looking forward to this film because I think it’s exceptionally brave to allow others to witness the healing stage after trauma,
AND on top of this…there will be doggos.
I think many people underestimate how important animals are to the human spirit.
The trailer and concept, the people in the movie and it’s kickass director…phew! When I think about things I’ve read, people I’ve spoken to over a decade in order to get a more meaningful background for Trent Starr, I’m amazed and grateful people like this exist. Some stories are enough to make you literally cry, and the fact some vets are walking among us with this stuff in their head is more testament about the strength these men and women have.
PRAY THEY STAND DOWN SOCIALS:
Pray They Stand Down Kickstarter: https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/bartowcostello/pray-they-stand-down-feature-film
PTSD Film site: https://praytheystanddown.com/
PTSD Film facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ptsdfilm2020/
PTSD fil instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ptsdfilm2020/
Pray They Stand Down theatrical trailer: https://youtu.be/f3TNJ2hqH90
TLDR:
*PTSD sucks and many people suffer it.
*Agent Trent Starr was the best I could do on paper(so far!) to talk about vets who live with trauma every day.
*Help the movie Pray They Stand Down get made. Here!
*If you are reading this and are one of those people who were discharged and have a story to tell/ who want to follow/chat/talk about nothing with me/show me pics of the town you live/whatever, I’m all ears. Hit me up. I will always listen, and I’m happy to network/be your friend, all of it if I can. The world needs amazing people like you. Even if you feel like you don’t fit into it right now. <3
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All content is no copyright infringement intended. All posts are opinion only and are subject to change due to experience, kicking ass and learning how to adult more effectively. If you don’t like it, don’t let the door hit ya where the good Lord split ya. Elements of original content may be reproduced with expressed permission from Ever Eden.
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